Episode 147: "I didn't recognize myself physically, mentally, or emotionally!": Kate's Story

A lifelong worker-outer, menopause hit Kate HARD. Sleep, anxiety, weight gain...and hopelessness. 

Now? She's got her health, energy, sleep...and self identity back! You don't want to miss her full story. 

Check out my (free) workshop, How to Fire Up Your Metabolism in Menopause and Beyond right here: www.MindStrongFitness.com

Transcript

Becoming MindStrong: 147: Kate Interview

0:00  
Welcome back to the becoming mind strong podcast. My name is

0:03  
Rachel, and I'm the founder and CEO of mind

0:05  
strong, where we have been helping

0:06  
menopausal women not just lose weight, not just get control their health, not just heal their metabolism, but have the skill for the rest of their life. For almost 10 years now, we have helped 1000s upon 1000s of women. It is who we are, what we do. And man, oh, man, is it a joy to do it? On that topic, I get asked a lot, you know, why? Why Perry and post menopause? Because, back in the day, when I first started mind strong, almost a decade ago, we helped every woman out there. And over the years, we niche down where that is all we work with. Perry and post menopause, that is our jam. And cheesy as it sounds, the word I will forever come back to is hope. I have just heard so many times, Rachel, I am doing everything right. Nothing is working. I give up trying. I give up hope. And something you'll hear me say a lot if you listen to this podcast, if you take in my content is it is true that the tool bag of our 20s, 30s, early 40s, it doesn't work anymore. If it did, we wouldn't be here. But that doesn't mean we're broken. It means we need a new tool bag, and that's what we're here to get. Which leads us to today's episode, which is a conversation with a recent ignite grad, Kate. And when Kate came to me her before, story was exactly what I'm talking about here on this topic of hope, she just said, Rachel, I do not feel comfortable in my skin. I feel like a shell of myself. I don't recognize myself, physically, mentally, emotionally, I feel like I am lost. And her literal words on the other side were, I have my life back. I feel like myself again. There's nothing What greater compliment in the world could you get then you gave me my life back. Watching Kate's spark come back. And as you'll hear in her story, this woman has been through the ringer. She had a lot of life happen, and the Kate that emerged on the other side a powerhouse standing in her power, comfortable in her skin, her Spark is back, the joy of all joys. So welcome to my conversation with Kate. I hope you enjoy.

2:12  
Welcome to the becoming mind strong podcast, the official podcast of mind strong fitness. My name is Rachel, and I'm the CEO of mind strong. And we are here for two things. We are here for hope in a stage of life where it feels like we are doing everything right and nothing is working. I am here to tell you you are not broken.

2:33  
This is fixable, and I

2:34  
promise there is hope. And number two, we are here for truth in an industry that is designed to keep us confused with shake systems and point systems and frozen meals. I promise you, it doesn't have to be that difficult. Someone can teach you the skill of riding a bike, someone can teach you the skill of knitting, and I can teach you to master the skill of nutrition. So are you ready? Let's rock and roll. You.

3:10  
If you think back to pre Ignite, Kate, can you tell us a little bit about rock bottom might be an extreme word to use, but what was going on that you got to a breaking point that brought you into this mind strong family,

3:25  
for sure. So for me, I'm actually a Lifetime Fitness person that never really had the struggle. I have four children each time. I actually lost the weight really easily. I was breastfeeding, and the weight kind of just came off, and when I went through a really hard time, started about seven years ago. I lost my first husband, and I was in my 40s, and it was really difficult, and fitness was always something that I turned to for, kind of like a reprieve my mental health, my joy, and also, just to you know, feel good and look good. So I got in great shape, and that continued on. Things were really good, with my fitness, with my nutrition. And then I turned 52 and menopause started, and the weight was coming on so rapidly that I didn't even know what to do. I didn't recognize myself, physically, mentally, emotionally, no matter what, I tried more, cardio, different routine, yoga, ballet, weights. I tried all of my old quote, unquote, tricks, things that I loved, things that usually brought me to a place of where I felt good, I looked good, I was fit. I just kept gaining weight. I had no energy, even though I kept trying to push through the workouts. I wasn't sleeping. I was completely. Anxious and so and I had also just gotten married, by the way, met my second husband and I got married. So there was, like, I had this, you know, these couple of years that things had turned around and things were going great. So this was like, in addition to that, then I found out, unfortunately, last September, that I had cancer, and so I had to have a tumor removed from my leg, and my surgeon said, Okay, zero activity for six weeks. And so then it came to the point where not only could I not attempt to feel good or look good, which I usually get from exercise and nutrition. It was at a standstill where I couldn't even I literally was just supposed to, you know, move to be able to keep the circulation going. And after that six weeks, I looked in the mirror and I said, I do not recognize myself in any way the you know, now I was even heavier. The weight wouldn't move. The eating was like so off track because I was hardly eating, and I also had started a remote job the year before. So now, in addition to all of this, I was literally back to back meetings, sedentary for like eight to 10 hours a day, and it was really, really hard,

6:27  
real quickly before we keep going in this episode, we are talking a lot about metabolisms in menopause in today's episode. So I want to offer you a chance to deepen your knowledge. If you haven't yet checked out my free workshop how to fire up your metabolism in menopause and beyond. It is one of my go to favorite pieces of content that I have out here in the interwebs. You can use the link in the show notes below, or go to mind strong fitness.com and you'll get a cute little pop up that'll get you straight into the workshop. Now let's get back to the show. That sounds like a perfect storm. And I know, like, I've heard that story so many times. I have this, this theory that when we tell the universe like I want something, they're like, how badly do you want it, right? So it's like you went through probably the greatest heartbreak there is, of losing your first husband. Life starts getting back on track. It's like, oh, I'm finding myself again. And then boom, here comes menopause, here comes cancer, like, you have been through it.

7:25  
It really was like, I was like, wow. What, you know, I just when you think that like you're through the hardest time, then you're thinking, wow. Now I have these, you know, four children, three step children, like, this is my new husband. Like, this is what I'm going through now. So yeah, it was, it was just really tough. And I was definitely at the breaking point for myself. And I was to tell you the truth, I was just scared. I had never really gotten to a point in my life where at least exercise and nutrition kind of didn't do the trick. So I just didn't know what else to do. Is really what it felt like. I just need to

8:05  
say also, this says so much about your personality. There are so many people that would just have bomb after bomb coming at them and just be like, I give up. Like, what is the test I give up? I roll over. And the fact that you use that to be like, no, no line in the sand, I need to do something about this. Like that. That's a testament to to your tenacity. And great, yeah, I mean that. So you join Ignite, we get going. I like to think of them as aha moments. Were there any initial aha moments where, as you were starting on this journey, you're like, wait a second, this might this might actually be different. Something might be changing here. Do you remember any of those?

8:40  
I do. I have to say, though, because I feel like, to your credit, I need to say that, Rachel, the one thing that happened for me to join ignite was that you gave me hope. And that's something that honestly, like, I don't you know, because you do this every day, I know that you're just so passionate, but for people out there who might not know exactly what they need, I can look back now to January and say I needed hope, and you gave me that. So I just have to say that I'm super grateful, and I have the chills saying it, because I feel like you just do this, and you know why you do it, but I don't know if anybody used that particular word, but hope is what I needed, and you gave me that.

9:27  
So I don't know you know this, but hope is my magic word. My word is always I have worked with menopausal women enough in the past almost decade to know that this is the stage of life where we lose hope, doing everything right, nothing's working. Feeling doubt split by our doctor, like I give up trying, I give up hope. So there is quite literally no better words that you could use to give me goosebumps than that. Thank you for saying that. That means the world to me.

9:53  
Absolutely. You're very welcome. Um, so yes, I definitely had some aha moments. I mean. Okay, the first thing was I it was maybe like a week or two in, and all of a sudden, like, I woke up, and I had actually slept for like six hours. I don't actually remember before that it had probably been like a year since I slept more than maybe three hours in a row, and I just was like, Wow, is this macros thing like magic, or what it was, just it was kind of unbelievable to me. And also, like my coach, Martina, like she was just so supportive, and like she knew I was very scared to start eating more, because for a lifetime, even when I was quote, unquote, like, super healthy and very aware of my nutrition, I just didn't tend to be, like, a very big eater. So adding the food that quickly, even though we were baby stepping it, it felt like, Can it really be this that's happening? So that was definitely, like, a huge aha moment. Then the fact that I did start to feel like I had the energy to do my workouts, and I couldn't believe it, because there was a point where no joke, like the month before, I said to my husband, who's also a Lifetime Fitness person, and he's super supportive, so I was so glad that he was kind of along on the journey. I looked at him and I said, I don't know if I'm ever going to be myself again, so I don't know what to say. But then when this started happening, where I started to feel like, oh my gosh, like, this is the cake that I know is in there, that was really the most shocking. And like, this huge sense of relief that, you know, I was watching all of your videos and listening and on social media, watching the little clips. And I was like, Okay, this is, this is actually what Rachel's talking about, you know, and, and so it just felt like a relief to know that we're making some progress here. You know, I don't know exactly what it's going to look like in two weeks, two months, or, you know, two years. But I just felt like it was, I kept thinking of like progress, not perfection. You know,

12:29  
I love that this self identity, piece of this, I think, gets brushed over too much, right? Like I heard you say a few times, I didn't recognize myself. And to me, that's, that's the arrow like for let's forget about energy, sleep, weight loss, all the things that we know are very important for our health, but especially as women, when we're looking in the mirror saying, whose body is this? Mentally, physically, emotionally, who am I right now? Getting that back, having that hope back of Oh, I feel like myself again. I don't think there's anything more important than that.

12:59  
For sure, 100% you are correct. Agree.

13:02  
All right, I want to put you in the coach's chair for a second. This is my favorite question to ask. I want you to imagine that instead of Rachel, founder of mind strong on this side of the call, I am newbie Rachel. And I'm feeling just like, pre Ignite, Kate. I'm feeling like I don't recognize myself, my my sleep is all messed up. I'm feeling, I've heard it referred to as like a shell of myself. I love that, that feeling that that brings, yeah, and I hear about mind strong, Ignite, see my videos, whatever. And boy oh boy, am I skeptical, because you and I both know this is a world of being promised the world, and nobody delivers. So I'm second guessing it is this. Rachel chick for real. I don't know if I'm going to stick with it, whatever the beliefs are up there. What do you coach Kate say to nervous, skeptical newbie Rachel?

13:59  
So I have to also tell you that for nine years, I was a lactation counselor and postpartum doula, and the biggest thing that I found then is what I feel like would work for someone now is I understand where you are at and how you might be feeling with all of those different things going on in your body and your mind, but I am here to help and support you alongside this journey, because I know that when I started telling Martina some of my fears, it was like exactly the things that you were talking about, and so it was such a like a way to guide and just know I'm not in it alone, just knowing that other people have walked this path before me and that it wasn't going to be so scary. And I think that's. Like the leap of faith that when you are ready to take it just feels like I actually can do this, because I'm not alone.

15:12  
That's so powerful. You know, behind the scenes, I'll tell you a quick story. Back in the day, mind strong used to only be one to one coaching, like we're going back almost a decade, when I was the only person of mind strong. And what I would hear is I would have a an Ignite member in London, and I remember in New York and all over the world. And every time I got on we used Skype back then instead of zoom, every time I got on Skype, I would hear very similar stories, right? I'm feeling gaslit. I'm feeling hopeless. And I remember the moment I was like, Man, if I could just put all of you in a room together, you would see you're not alone. And we added the community element to ignite for the reason you're saying, I think, especially as menopausal women, because this isn't being taught in med school, because it's not it's becoming a buzzword now that Oprah's talking about it, but it has never been popularized. It's so easy to feel like this is just me. I'm broken, I'm alone in this journey. And not that we wish this on other women, but I think it's powerful to see, oh, this is actually, these are the common struggles of menopause. There's women who have gotten to the other side. I'm walking that journey now. Now I get to reach back and take the other people's hands and show them to use your word that there's hope.

16:29  
Yeah, exactly.

16:31  
Kate, is there anything we didn't touch on, anything we didn't talk about, about your own journey, about what you would want other people to know, that you'd like to share?

16:40  
Um, just that, I think that knowing that you have those weekly videos out, and they would always come out at such a timely perfect point, it was like, just when you feel like I was away on a work trip last week, and really just still, I was making it work, like I was prepping, like going to CVS to get, you know, whatever water and snacks that I can have to add, because my days were going to be like 14 hour days, and then that day came about the overage day, and I was supposed to have a team dinner, because I'm a sales leader, and so I have, you know, people that I was traveling with. And I said to myself, You know what? This feels really scary, but I'm going to try it. I just think that the power of having those little videos each week to look forward to, it probably means so much more than you realize, because you've been doing this for so long that it was like they just would come at the perfect time. And so when I would hit play and go, You know what? Like, I have this. And the greatest thing was that I actually realized yesterday that I lost a few ounces. Yes, despite having that week of travel and having the true almost 500 calories over. I was like, Okay, this works, you know, like, it's just really good to know that this isn't something that you've created on your own and that you use the science. I love the science. My husband's a science teacher. Amazing. I feel like every time you bring that up and say, like, this isn't just magic, it's science. I'm like, yes, it's it's really powerful to know that there is evidence behind what you're sharing. So for me, I'm data driven, and I love that piece just as much as the emails and the check ins and the way that you and your team will even just put, like, the Excel swomo Just sign, it's those little things that it feels so personal and not just like, oh, you know, we're sending a mass email. It's just makes you feel like it's special. So thank you.

18:59  
I love that, but we use that a lot that I think it's overused and cheesy sometimes in companies. But when they say the family, that is not a word I throw around lightly. I've I've told my team from the day that it became more than just me. We will never grow faster than we can keep this community atmosphere, because otherwise, what's the point? Right? We got into this for human connection, to change lives, to to feel like we're doing good in the world, and the second you turn into this pump people through the system, kind of deal like, why we've lost the heart of what we do. So hearing that, hearing that that's resonating, makes my heart happy.

19:34  
Huge, huge. Even the fact that you wanted to have this call today, right? You obviously are so passionate and caring, and the people that you hire, it shows because the entire team has been amazing, great experience.

19:47  
Kate, you're our new PR manager. Thank you so much. Thank you for taking the time. I know there's so many women out there who, as you were saying, they're Lifetime Fitness people like I have been doing this my whole life. Menopause hit the stuff that used to. Work doesn't work. I don't recognize myself. And that's what I love about these is that that story is going to resonate very differently than when I talk to someone who's yo yo dieted their whole life, and we need to hear it from people who have walked that walk before us. So thank you, and thank you for taking the time to share with us.

20:17  
Thank you so much. Appreciate you. Bye.

20:23  
For more information on mind strong fitness, or to apply for a free one to one strategy session with my incredible all female team, visit www dot mindstrong fitness.com, you you.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai